Sunday, July 8, 2018

Day 1: Jumbo Shrimp Biscuits and other 'Gulf' Fare

Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp vs Montgomery Biscuits


What happens when Zach, Ben, Pat, and Ray get together? No, not the beginning of the Apocalypse. It’s the start of another Scrappy Journeymen road trip. Without the threat of hurricanes and storms to stop us this time, we make our way to the south east for a Gulf tour. Our first stop; The Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp, because that’s on the Gulf right? This year the LAZY metrics return with a vengeance, seeping into our overall schedule. I.E. we only have four stops this year.

Taking a detour to a Putt-Putt course in Fernandina Beach allowed us to get on I-16. What’s so special about I-16 you ask? Nothing. But one can drive its entire length in only a few hours. So we did. Someone pointed out that technically we only drove the entire length of I-16 East and that we should turn around since we were already there and hit the whole thing. The desire to actually see some baseball and that pesky LAZY mentality won out and we continued to Fernandina Beach.

Our usual wagers were in place for our first course of the trip. Last place buys first place two drinks and third place buys second place a drink and keeps score next time. Ominous clouds loomed in the distance, but we weren’t deterred. We managed to squeeze in both course just before the skies opened up. Ray finished first in both courses, but would soon come to regret it (see Thirsty Thursday highlight).
You wouldn't believe how many putts got "pushed from wind" on this course.
Tonight’s game pit the Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp against the Montgomery Biscuits.

Highlights
1. The Double A stadium in Jacksonville had a strange layout requiring a lot of going up and down stairs to get where you needed to go. With some random stairwells that lead directly out of the stadium and Thirsty Thursday beer specials, it’s easy to imagine at least a few people accidentally found themselves outside the gates. 

The "I don't want to pay attention and not get a concussion" net extended fairly far down the line.

2. Speaking of Thirsty Thursday, $2 twenty four oz. Budweiser products is a heck of a deal, except when you factor in there were only two locations to obtain said specials. And it was Budweiser. They also had $1 twelve oz. beers, but it seemed almost wasteful to spend that much time in line for a regular sized beer. The Journeymen are resourceful however, and still managed to procure close to 100 ounces each. A feat that left Ray’s head swimming the entire day after.

3. While there was no way to do a full lap inside the park, the stadium wasn’t all bad. It did have some positive aspects, such as having the kid’s zone out in home run territory, away from everything.

4. There were ample food and drink locations for non-Thirsty Thursday fare. What do you do when you can’t decide between getting pizza or a burger? The Jumbo Shrimp have you covered with the Pizza Burger. A massive beef patty sandwiched between two pizzas. They claim it feeds four, but Zach was positive he could take one down on his own. On the other hand a quarter of the concoction was enough to give Ray the meat sweats.

How is this not a thing everywhere!?

5. Ben procured another unique food option in the Shrimp and Pork Nachos. Be warned, you better really like shrimp if you get it. Even the chips taste… shrimpy. This tasty(?) fare may have also been the impetus for Ben searching for seafood served in a helmet for the rest of the trip.

6. It was Teacher Appreciation night at the park, so the rest of us were finally obligated to appreciate Ben for his services. Though, the Jumbo Shrimp appeared to just be paying lip service, as there was no clear indication of how teachers were being appreciated.

7. In-between inning shenanigans included a Bacon Battle. Two persons enter, both leave after having whacked each other with pillow sized strips of bacon. We were also a bit surprised when a couple of boys came out in tutus during another between inning promo. It was the home run derby where they each hit a ball off a tee from wherever it previously landed until one of them hits it over the wall. The surprise was that we hadn’t realized Jacksonville was progressive enough to promote cross dressing. Good on you Jacksonville.

8. The game was a pitcher’s duel from the get go. The visiting Montgomery Biscuits had a knuckleballer on the mound, J. D. Martin, who has had a long and storied career that took him briefly through a Korean league.

9. While there were a couple hits, we missed most of them standing in one of the two previously mentioned Thirsty Thursday lines. During one of these trips, Ray and Zach had enough beer in them to briefly mistake a running, screaming crowd as a monster attack of some sort. However it was our good friend the storm cloud from Putt-Putt catching up to us.

One might recognize this cloud from Independence Day.

10. By the fifth inning, we each had a full beer, and we could only sit and watch the rain fill up the field. The announcer was quite amusing during the delay, showing “Dancing Homer” and “Who’s on First” on the big screen and commenting how the light drizzle wouldn’t deter us.

11. Though they did finally call the game , the Journeymen did not give up so easily (did I say something about storms not stopping us?). We sat our ground, finishing our beers and closed the place down. At one point Ben attempted to use his Teacher status to get Ray on the field after they had commented that the tarp looked like a giant slip and slide. It was only after the police started making their way through the park that we decided to call the Lyft.

Tell me that doesn't look like a giant Slip 'N Slide.

12. With the long drive down and all the aforementioned Budweiser products in our system, we forgot to look for a program. Couple that with the long wait times in line and only five innings of ball and we failed to catch any interesting player names.

13. There was no mention of crowd size, though according to google the Bragan Field at the Baseball Grounds of Jacksonville holds 11,000.  Just eyeballing it, it may have been a third to half full before the rain hit.

Booze addled, rain soaked, Lyft waiting.

It was an inauspicious start to this year’s journey, with more hours spent in the car than hits on the field. Final score after four and a half innings; Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp 0, Montgomery Biscuits 0. We were offered free tickets to the double header the next day, but we had another beach town to be at. Up next, Pensacola.

LAZY Metrics

6/10. Confusing layout, lack of actually appreciating teachers, and rain shortened baseball colored Jacksonville a little negatively. It was still a fun experience with enthusiastic between-baseball activities and a good crowd vibe. If you plan on coming to a game, check the weather. Also, if you value your life, don’t (do?) get the Pizza Burger.